Pet Names (Wreck it Ralph)

It was a bright sunny day and Ralph, Vanellope, Felix and Calhoun were on an outing.  They had game jumped into another racing game that wasn't made of sweets, and settled down in a large green meadow, with a single tree to add variety to the landscape. There was a light breeze blowing and the grass rustled as it swayed with the flowers that grew in patches across the terrain.  Vanellope and Ralph were off climbing the tree trying to collect the bright plump apples that grew on it. Felix and Calhoun were lying in the grass not too far away.

Ralph lifted Vanellope onto the nearest branch.  "Ok, now be careful," His voice had an edge of concern.

"What are you, my baby sitter? Come on!" Vanellope teased as she moved up the sturdy trunk

"I just don't want you to get hurt!"

"You worry too much you worry wart!"

"I worry because I care president fartfeathers," Ralph put his large hands on a branch and stood on tiptoes and tried to get a better view at her location.

"Well stop being such a freakishly large mommy!"  Vanellope picked an apple that looked especially sweet and threw it down to ralph.  It hit him in the face and bounced onto the floor.

"Ouch!" Vanellope heard Ralph complain at the hit.

"Don't lose it captain destroyer, that one will be beautiful with caramel!" Vanellope could almost taste the smooth rich caramel over the crunchy sweet apple surface as she spoke.

Ralph picked up the fruit as Vanellope threw it down, "Can't you ever eat anything without putting candy on it you cookie monster sugar binger?" He asked. He couldn't see Vanellope but he heard her laugh, and to that he chuckled back, but another apple fell and hit him on the face again, making him impatient, "Hey stop that you carless monkey! I only have one face!" He shouted a little louder than he had to.

Vanellope blasted a laugh "I didn't know that was a face!"

"You better calm it down princess!" He played

"It's president! President!" Vanellope looked down at her friend through the leaves, "Don't say princess again you hammy hands!"

Calhoun could hear Ralph and Vanellope call each other names.  She was lying on her stomach, propping herself up on her elbows.  Felix lay on his back in front of her fast asleep.  

Normally she didn't mind the two as they shouted insults to each other but today she had hoped for a quieter evening; and she felt her patience getting tried.  She frowned out of habit at the slight annoyance.

"What's wrong Tammy?" she heard Felix ask.  Tamora looked down, she hadn't noticed that he woke up.  

"Nothing--" She began but a loud sound bellowed through the once serene meadow making her and Felix cringe

"STOP EATING THEM YOU HUMAN DISPOSAL!" Vanellope jumped out of the tree as she yelled and landed on Ralph's shoulder.  She tried to peer into his closing mouth.

"No can do you nutrition murderer!" He spoke through the apples he had shoved in his mouth, "These babies deserve to be eaten untouched by your confection obsession!"

"NO FAIR NO FAIR NO FAIR!!" Vanellope complied as she tugged on Ralph's shirt collar.

Felix wasn't sure but he thought he heard Tamora growl.  "Don't be upset honey!" He immediately tried to sooth her, "They're just having fun!" he gave a soft laugh to show how harmless the ordeal was, but she was beyond words.

"I don't mind harmless name-calling Felix, but she's screeching like a cy-bug!" She began to stand up to go talk to the banshee. Felix felt anxious; he couldn't let her go because he didn't know what craziness would follow.  He reached up and grabbed her arms to try and keep her there.  

"Please stay," He quietly begged. Tamora looked down at Felix when he grabbed her, she felt irritated at the gesture, but he looked genuinely concerned.  His big eyes opened extra big making him look quite adorable.  Tamora looked away in annoyance because she just couldn't leave after that.  It's one of the things she hated and loved about Felix.  No one else could make her change her mind.  She held her breath for a minute in an attempt to calm down then looked at him again.  "Fine…" She heaved.

Felix still held onto her, but he loosened his grip.  He knew what a big deal it was for her to give in to him, so he gave her the crooked smile he knew she loved.  She raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing?" She tried to stay hard, but her character cracked and she smiled too.  "Ugh, you're going to be the death of me," She pushed his cap down in front of his eyes.  Felix just laughed and raised his hat to its proper place.

"Well, if I remember correctly you call me nicknames too Tammy," He glanced up at her sheepishly. Tamora rolled her eyes playfully.  There was no way she was doing this with Vanellope and Ralph around. No, no, no.

"Felix--"

"AHHHHH! STOP IT RALPH! THAT WAS THE LAST ONE!! YOU CHOMPING DESSERT THIEF!"  Vanellope's strong squeals cut through the terrain again.

"Like what nicknames?" Tamora said immediately after the scream was done shredding her tolerance. Anything would be better than what would happen if she didn't distract herself form the hyperactive Vanellope, besides she was yelling so loudly they would never hear them.

Felix laughed and his face began to show the honey glows, "Well…I recall calling you my sweet angel face," He smiled deeply.  Tamora half closed her eyes and returned the smile.  Sometimes in crazy random days they would call each other ridiculous pet names as a game.  Today was going to be one of those days.

"I remember," She murmured, "That was right after I said that you were my handsome baby boo."  She said quietly, making Felix close his eyes and giggle. The first time they had done this the words tasted like rotten milk in her mouth, but now she actually enjoyed it, that is as long as there was no one else around to hear it.

"Well, you're my hun bun hottie," Felix felt like a rebel whenever he called her that one. He only said it because he knew she liked it; and he felt convivial as he heard his wife laughing loudly.  

"Well you're my huggy bear kissy face," She cooed after somewhat composing herself from the previous pet name. They both blushed along with their laughs.

"Well you're my lady love lala lamb," He declared dreamily.

Tamora suddenly saw Ralph and Vanellope standing by them from the corner of her eye. Every muscle in her body tightened. She wasn't sure if Felix could see them, and she almost wanted to stop their game.  There was no way Ralph and Vanellope would witness this. She wouldn't allow it.

But an idea bubbled into her mind: Revenge.

Her smile widened as she ignored Ralph and Vanellope and scooted closer to Felix.  She pulled his hat off and began to play with his hair, "Well you're my mooky munchkin prince charming," She finished her
turn.

Felix got a little surprised.  She had suddenly become very affectionate, but he didn't care! Bring it on even.  Felix leaned up so they were touching noses, "Well you're my sugarpuff pudding pop sweetiepie rose," He was having the time of his life! A beautiful day, a beautiful wife, and no one was bothering them. What a great way to pass the afternoon!  

He of course hadn't noticed Vanellope and Ralph in the sidelines. Both were red faced with mouths hanging open.

Calhoun smiled because Felix was overjoyed, and she could see Vanellope starting to gag. "Oh, well you're my jujube teady bear loveylove honey pants!" She spoke in a higher pitch than usual, and in one swift practiced motion she sat up and wrapped her arms around Felix.  "Try to beat that Fix-it," She enticed him with a breathy whisper.

Vanellope and Ralph gave each other a sickening look.  "Ewwww!!!" Vanellope clutched her stomach and then pretended she was choking.  She wished she really was; they were acting like lovesick puppies! Disgusting! Ralph just coughed and looked at the ground awkwardly.

Felix accepted the challenge and wrapped his arms around Tamora's neck, "You're my gorgeous fluffer-nutter doll face goldie tootsie knockout gangsta baby!" he smugly stated and knew that he had just topped all of her pet names.  
Calhoun stared at him in surprise.  That was a good one; she'd never heard it before.  Her face turned redder than she wanted it to. Felix saw her surprise, "I think I win…" he leaned in closer.

Calhoun tried to think anything to top him, but her mind went blank. There was no way to beat Felix at his own game. "Come here you sexy dork!" She finally blurted out and kissed his mouth before he could try and say anything else. The game usually ended this way.  Felix always had better pet names, but Tamora didn't care, one day she would get him. Her thoughts were cut off though when she felt a wave of heat rush up while they kissed, wow he was good.

Both of them had forgotten about their audience at that point. "UHHGGGGG!! That's it! I'm going home!!" Vanellope stomped her foot as hard as she could and turned to leave, her face was red, and a scowl that seemed to be permanent took over her features.  "I could have lived my whole life without seeing or hearing any of that sickening baby mushy love stuff!" She was furious.

"Right behind you kid!" Ralph was more than ecstatic to have an excuse to get out.  He was glad Felix had found the woman of his dreams and all, but he was going to have to talk with him about PDA.  Felix could definitely tone it down.

When the kiss was over Felix looked around.  He thought he had heard Ralph and Vanellope close by.  He looked over his wife's shoulder at the apple tree, but they weren't there.  He looked at Tamora, "Where are Vanellope and Ralph?" He asked.

She could see them over Felix's head as they boarded the train and left the game.  She looked back at Felix and shrugged, "I don't know, maybe they couldn't wait to caramel their apples." She pretended to guess.  The revenge tasted as sweet as the kiss, and now they were alone, which wasn't part of the original plan, but a welcomed bonus.

Felix looked jumbled. "They could have at least told us," He looked at the ground deep in thought, "Should we leave too?" he looked back at her.  He didn't feel like leaving, but perhaps…

Tamora smiled, "No." She leaned in and kissed him again.